No, I don’t mean that in the sense that it’s rigged, although it would explain a few things. I mean that in the sense that what was once an exciting new concept for performance/reality/singing shows has become a broken mess. To a lot it might look like nothing’s changed, but that’s not true.

The show has been falling off the rails for a few seasons now – probably right at the time Kat Robichaud was eliminated a couple weeks into the live rounds. It’s tough sometimes to watch this show when you know your favorite never has a chance to actually win. And once your favorites are gone, the show is basically purposeless. It’s just another season wasted – you could give the contract to the people with talent, or you could just give it the mediocre pile of crap that won the popularity contest.

I mean, really – the show’s in its eighth season now, and the last time the winner of the show actually deserved to win, it was 2012. Cassadee Pope was the last person to win that deserved it. Only Javier Colon in season one before her deserved to win besides her, even though there were better options than him at the time.

Let’s take a look at what it would look like if the most talented singer won each season.

Season 1 Winner: Vicci Martinez
Season 2 Winner: Juliet Simms
Season 3 Winner: Cassadee Pope
Season 4 Winner: Michelle Chamuel
Season 5 Winner: Kat Robichaud
Season 6 Winner: Kat Perkins
Season 7 Winner: Taylor John Williams
Season 8 Winner: Kimberly Nichole (or Sarah Potenza)

When Kimberly was eliminated this week, it crushed the remaining hope I had in this show. And it’s not really the show’s fault, it’s the fans who don’t know what real music is and what real talent is. There are some things they do that should be changed but for the most part it’s the fault of stupid millenials who don’t know what real music is. And this is a 28 year old speaking, not a 50 year old.

Sure, for the most part, you can see my favorite is biased towards punky, rocker chick for the most part, and every year I’m pissed off beyond belief when they’re eliminated because they are the best. But this season has truly pushed me over the edge – not just because Kimberly was eliminated, but because she got so close and she wasn’t the only one I was rooting for. In fact, this season I found that I liked A LOT of the contestants. More than I ever have before. I counted a full sixteen out of the top 40 that I liked. SIXTEEN. I normally like five at most. I felt like, this season, I was certainly going to come out of it happy. Surely with 16 people I liked going into the knockout rounds, I’d be good. Sure, some would go home in those rounds – not all could be immune. But a good number would and did make the live rounds. Surely this season was going to be “Un-fuck-up-able” even by American voter standards. (I mean, Americans did vote in George Bush and tons of other psycho Republicans.) But I’d go home happy, right? Right?? RIGHT?????????

Alas, no.

Just when I thought they couldn’t fuck this one up, THE FOUND A WAY TO FUCK THIS UP. Firstly, my favorite going into the battle rounds or KO rounds, Anthony Riley, withdrew from the competition due to substance abuse problems. I’m sad about it, but I’m happy he’s doing what he needs to get himself healthy. Good for him. Then, a lot of my favorites that made it to the live rounds were eliminated the first week. Only Kimberly and Hannah Kirby kept surviving, until they were both eliminated in the past two weeks. I thought that after Corey Kent White went home the show would have a chance to do what it hadn’t in recent years, and reached the non-country audience of the show that so desperately needs to be reached every year so the country “music” buffoons don’t take over the show and get their buffoon representative the win. (And it’s sad, because I liked Corey – but once he was the only country guy on the show I had to hate him because he represented a “genre” of music that must go extinct for the benefit of music-kind. There is simply no place for it.) Kimberly even survived a week after singing a song, Creep by Radiohead, I know got someone eliminated last season or the one before. It may have been Sugar Joans now that I think of it.

And now we’re left with five talentless pieces of garbage left in the top five, none of whom deserve a recording contract. Sawyer Fredericks winning would absolutely kill this show. He ABSOLUTELY BUTCHERED Simple Man last week and his one fan must’ve voted all night to get him in. HOW ARE YOU ALLOWED TO STAY ON A SHOW AFTER BUTCHERING A CLASSIC SONG LIKE THAT? I mean, granted, Shinedown’s version of it is way better than the original, but still. Austin Jenckes did a good version of it a few seasons back, but did he win? Nope. Koryn Hawthorne’s idea of a good song is singing “Make it rain” over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and you get the idea. How the fuck does that suffice as a good song these days? What kind of people are they allowing make music? I mean, I haven’t been into mainstream music in a long time, but back in my proverbial day, mainstream, popular music was at least GOOD. Nowadays everything you hear on the radio is absolute trash. Yes, there are a few songs that are overplayed that I like just because they’re catchy or I have a joke about them – guilty pleasure kind of songs – they include Radioactive, Mups (the overplayed Fall Out Boy Light Em Up song), Shake it Off, and Bang Bang. I like those because they’re catchy, even if I know they’re shit and overplayed, and most are sung by talentless pieces of garbage.

Then there’s India Carney who’s so relevant I keep forgetting her when trying to list the remaining people on the show. Joshua Davis who is only on the show still because of voodoo, wizardry, and bullshit. And Meghan Linsey is just kind of coasting along. Watch her win.

A big problem with this show is that it’s impossible for the singers to stray too far out into the realm of good music to sing – they have to stick with popular, mainstream, top 40 kinds of songs or they’re gone because the voters vote based on song choice and not by talent. Trust me, it’s a thing. If they aren’t singing a song I know, I’m not even listening. (I should point out, I don’t vote because it’s pointless. I did in season 3 for Cassadee but that was pointless to because her win was a forgone conclusion.) (For more stuff related to her win being a forgone conclusion, please read a previous Voice blog I wrote almost exactly a year ago: https://mzrc.wordpress.com/2014/05/09/the-voice-is-sometimes-unfair/)

And that’s the sad thing, really – the show really is just a popularity contest. All of these shows are, really. Once you’re in the bottom once – even if you aren’t eliminated – you know you aren’t going to win, barring voodoo, wizardry, and bullshit. I’ve seen it on The Voice. I’ve seen it on So You Think You Can Dance. And what’s really sad about it in terms of for the Voice is that, while the show supposedly prides itself on being about the talent of the individual and not on their appearance – they hear their voices without looking at them and decide to put them on the show, which is a great concept. In theory. In practice, while they do get on the show because of their voices, in the end – it’s their appearance that decides whether people vote for you or not.

In the end, if you don’t look like a country singer, that’s already a lot of points against you with the “strong country fanbase.” If you don’t jive with the “strong country fanbase” you aren’t going to do well. Don’t think this fanbase exists? Ask yourself something – how many times has a country artist won or at least made the finale? ALMOST EVERY TIME. Absolutely no one wanted Craig Wayne Boyd to win, yet here we are. Jake Worthington made the finale. Danielle Bradberry is a country singer. Hell, so is Cassadee Pope but she’s actually talented and close enough to the rock side of things that it’s ok.

The underlying feud of this show is really Republicans vs. rocker chicks, isn’t it? I mean, “strong country fanbase” means Republicans. And talented, punky, rocker chicks basically represent almost everything that scares the fuck out of Republicans that isn’t a terrorist or Barack Obama (you know, the good president who accomplished all of the Republican goals but got no credit for it because they’re all racist fucks) or the next President of the U.S. who will also not be a Republican. #Pipebomb #HaveFunWastingTimeWithYourPrimaries #YouCanLineThemUpJustForTheDemsToKnockThemRightBackDown

But anyways, enough about the psychopaths of this country.

Some of the things the show itself does is annoying, too. If I have to listen to Carson Daly say that someone is going to “take us to church” I’m going to try to punch him in the face through the tv. The second a contestant sings a song that isn’t a mainstream hit or an old classic – you know, they delved into the realm of actual, good music – it is dubbed an “interesting song choice” by Carson, as if it’s a tongue-in-cheek way of saying “This person is about to sing a song you don’t like because it’s actually good and not by one of your precious, talentless pop stars so you should probably not vote for them because we wouldn’t want good songs played on this show at all.” And then they’re immediately eliminated that week. Don’t sing a rock song, you’ll be gone. And the next time he calls an Ed Sheeran song (the aforementioned Koryn Hawthorne “Make it rain” song, no less) “powerful” I might have to kick him again. There’s nothing powerful about someone saying “Make it rain” a million times. Just ask Roman Reigns, see how he’s doing with his fan support.

All I know is that there are so many talented singers who have come on this show who have deserved to win but fell to the stupidity of American voters. I feel like we need to stop allowing people to vote for the winners and we need to crown winners based on actual talent. Or we need to reformat the show. Maybe have a top 16, draw ballots, and have a tournament bracket setup, and they compete against other contestants one on one, and the public votes for the one they like best – their votes would be a percentage, and those percentages would be added to a score given to them by the coaches and the one with the highest score would advance. (All four coaches would have 100 points to give total, in which they could give them both 50, one 70 and the other 30, or one 100 and the other 0, depending on how they think they did.) They actually did something similar to this in season two in the second to last week where a coach had 100 points to split between two of his/her own contestants, which would be added to the public’s votes for them (percentage of votes they received of a total of both of those contestants votes). That would make for a more balanced, real winner. And if my favorites didn’t win, I could at least live with it because it wouldn’t be based on voter stupidity.

#LaterMarks #ButImNotWrong #LunaticFringe #StraightEdgeMeansImBetterThanYou #FollowTheBuzzards #IAmTheEaterOfWorlds #WalkWithTheReapers #AJIsTheBestDivaInTheWorld #PaigeIsTheBloodyDivasChampion #InZayn #BalorClub #FightOwensFight #WelcomeToTheWasteland #SAWFT